Yup, blame the site.
(I got a distinction for my Grade VIII music theory back in 1977 and some of it stuck.)
It sounds bloody awful because it's like putting a one legged cat with no sense of rhythm on a keyboard and getting it to jump around a bit, but only on the white notes, but not staying nicely in the key of C, which could make it sounds OK. But doesn't. I could explain but I won't.
There's no time signature (no number of beats to the bar) and the random semi-quavers just make it sound as if you've tripped up a bit. Not your fault at all.
I bet I could set your words to music and make them sound lovely, but I would take longer than the website.